Month 5 + Juliana’s Healed Story

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I’ve pat down another month of healing. It’s gone by fairly quickly – more quickly than previous months! I remember in Feb and March feeling like a single week felt like an entire month. It was very slow going and wasn’t sure how I’d make it through, but my time perception has changed greatly and feel like I’m just trucking along until I can finally feel close to 100% again. May has been a month of improvements, as well as back-tracking. I’ll give you the bad first…

The Bad:

Had a pretty big flare after drinking a glass of wine. Not quite there yet! Perioral area has worsened (mainly the region around my mouth) has been raw, sensitive, red and flakey. Nightly itching is a regular occurance. Still taking antihistamines to put me to sleep. Otherwise, I’m awake half the night. Skin still looks pretty gnarly – deep fissures and wrinkling, especially on my arms and neck. Also still pretty dry… but who isn’t in a time like this? I have rough linchified areas on my inner calves, neck, lower back, wrists, below the navel and arms.  Anxiety still pretty high. Not nearly as bad as it was just a couple months ago when I was experiencing a feeling of doom before laying my head to rest. The increasing temperatures and humidity of summer has caused flaring, so I’ve been avoiding the outdoors. Taking the bus is still very difficult as the waiting periods are long enough for my body to heat up in warm/hot weather, so i’ve been taking taxis to go places. Also, I’ve had a noticeable B.O. this last month for no apparent reason and wonder if it has to do with what I’m eating or the withdrawal. I’ve read about many people having the same issue going through TSW. Has anyone found out conclusively if it’s caused by TSW?

The Good:

My skin is feeling and looking better. My face looks near normal. My thighs look untouched by TSW. My bum feels pretty darn smooth! The itching usually only ever happens during the night. Daytime itchies are common, but not as distracting as the night time ones. Still using apricot oil (was using the heavier grapeseed oil) but feel like I’ll soon be moving on a lighter oil soon. Coconut is next! Confidence is gradually reappearing. I notice myself smiling and laughing more 🙂 Able to tolerate cosmetics/makeup, so I can leave the house with eyebrows and lipgloss. Yay.

I went to Fabricland yesterday to pick up a couple different silky fabrics to get some summer scarves made. I’d really need to learn how to sew myself and have a few to choose from. Most of the current scarves I own now are too heavy for summer and want something to just cover my neck since it’s the most damaged/raw area.

I had a chance to meet Natasha from the ITSAN forum in Toronto. She was lovely and a pleasure to meet. Her strength and composure was inspiring and gave me something to hold on to. Hope to meet you again, Natasha!

Impressed that I’m able to slap on some makeup and run around outside. It feels good to finally go out on a regular basis. Oh, right – I also just started working again! I’m working at a retirement home as a “Companion” for en elderly woman, part-time.  Hands down, it’s the best job I’ve ever had. It’s kept me on my toes and surprisingly has given me a new appreciation for life.

My birthday is right around the corner. I’ll be turning 27 on June 25th. I think about how quickly time has passed me by and how great life can be when I’m healthy again. I’ve been thinking more about my career path and travelling I’d like to do next year. I guess that’s another post.

There’s news of a recent Healed Story by Juliana! She had it pretty rough. If you look at her photos and read about her experiences with TSW, it’s amazing to see how much happier and healthier she’s become. I believe it’s taken her 2 years to come to this point. The body truly does miraculous things and can heal. Another beautiful testimony to Topical Steroid Withdrawal and how these prescription creams can do more harm than good. Congratulations to you Juliana!

Sending warm healing vibes to you, xoxo.

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7 responses »

  1. Love the optimism and vibrancy coming through this post! I know you had a lot of dark days and its so wonderful to hear you are feeling and looking more “normal” and now this damn TSW thing isn’t running your life as it has been!

  2. Glad to read that your skin is looking better and you are getting out and about more confidently. I too have perioral dematitis along with rosacea and I know what it’s like to just want to draw the blinds and curl up in bed all day (which I have done on more than one occasion). All the best for June and more healing 🙂

  3. Izabela,
    Yes, it’s wonderful finally getting out again! I was getting out earlier on, but it was difficult just itching constantly and oozing and being in pain… But getting out during those earlier days also got me through it because being secluded in my own room was really getting to me and put me in a dark place. I haven’t had a chance to read your blog yet… are you a “red-skinner” or withdrawing from steroids as well? PS – Love your hair in your pic – way cute! I’ve been growing my hair long but the hair loss, I’m wondering if I should go short again. Hmm!

  4. Hey, I too suffered from really bad health anxiety and panic disorder when suffering from topical steroid addiction/facial eczema, although other factors prolly contributed. I’ve kind of gotten over it now, but i took about 3 months to feel normal.
    I also used topical steroids in a way similar to you, and for the same amount of time, although i stopped use in mid march so it will be interesting to see if mine progresses like yours

  5. Hi Leizel! Just got a chance to check your blog. I’m writing from Kerala, India apparently the ayurvedic doctors here know about steroid addiction and have had great success with treating people going through TSW. Their belief is that our blood has toxins accumulated from the steroid use so I’m going through their treatment protocol for about 21 days. I’ll be sharing my experience once I finish the protocol, so I’ll reserve judgement for now. It was really nice meeting you too Leizel! You have a lovely soul. Looking forward to getting in touch again.

  6. Happy birthday!
    Reading through your blog. Can totally relate to what you have said. We are around the same time frame. I am 5 months in. Hopefully the worst is behind us 🙂

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